DE 
| BROKEN BLOG MOBILE |
HOME | EN DE
| |
4 February 2012
P. G. Wodehouse said: “I just sit at a typewriter and curse a bit.” Feels
like writing this blog sometimes. He also said: “I know I was writing stories
when I was five. I don't know what I did before that. Just loafed I
suppose.“
For submitting a comment, please fill in all fields of the form (incl. the security key) and click on the send button below:
3 February 2012
You must think I'm a fool
So prosaic and awkward and all
D'you think you've got me down?
D'you think I've never been out of this town?
... (song by KEANE "Leaving So Soon?")
2 February 2012
This is not Wikileakes and I do not want to mention the source but I have to
share this quote. It is a definition that struck me and it goes like this: “Tech
freaks are those ... who get kick and satisfaction in showing their
technical prowess even if it amounts to creating inconvenience to others. … Sometimes
they take control of the computer controlled machines belonging to someone
else. They disrupt the communication systems and channels through their technical
skills and knowledge.” That could be the description of any support
hotline really (but it isn’t).
Another quote I also found quite remarkable: The added value of the presentation
was rather low and we presume that this was exactly what the speaker intended.
1 February 2012
The essence of all truly new is that the process of getting there has no master
plan but follows tense, chaotic and rumbling democratic circumstances. This
was written in an article in a paper I kept from mid December. And I know
I have been accused before of reading oldspapers instead of newspapers.
31 January 2012
I was kindly reminded of Martin Niemöller today and his famous quote:
“
First they came for the communists, and I didn't speak out because I wasn't
a communist.
Then they came for the socialist, and I didn't speak out because I wasn't a
socialist.
Then they came for the trade unionists, and I didn't speak out because I wasn't
a trade unionist.
Then they came for me and there was no one left to speak out for me.”
29 January 2012
“
Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?” -
Mary Oliver
28 January 2012
Why do I get so many Viagra spam mails these days? I read that dissolving one
in water and watering Christmas trees makes them stay fresh well into late
January but I should think hardly anyone has any Christmas trees left by
now…
One of my dear readers says that I may send the blue spam over. Seems more people
than I thought still do have Xmas trees!
And then I got some more analytical and highly amusing remarks, stating that
spam seems to consist of either financial enticements or performance enhancements
or system extensions. So in reverse order it is either to make it bigger or to
make it work better or to be able to pay so much that it does not matter. However
dissolving the performance type spam in water and giving the result to your Xmas
tree may be going too far even if it can keep it going strong almost until Easter.
27 January 2012
Getting used to public transport is quite challenging for me. Just one example:
I sat in a more or less empty tram. A man of the type Bill Bryson in his
early 30ies sits down next to me, reads my paper and then says rather abruptly:
Women in the booming (?) economy may have some benefit from a good business
newspaper! One could, he continued his monologue, trade wheat online these
days now, trade it to the third dimension (?). Never before in history could
humanity trade wheat as varied as now ... the rest of his arguments were
incomprehensible.
26 January 2012
I read a comment
(in German only) on Kodak’s bankruptcy that states something
I agree on totally, namely that waiting has become unfashionable. It is an
interesting thought that we lost the original since do more and more digitally.
Jim Rocket says that "the lack of an original image is the phantom pain
of photography."
25 January 2012
Europe will get new data protection laws. George Orwell is probably already
turning in his grave, given official press
statements like: “The right
to be forgotten is of course not an absolute right. There are cases where
there is a legitimate and legally justified interest to keep data in a data
base. ... It is clear that the right to be forgotten cannot amount to a right
of the total erasure of history.”
Received comment: Dear CBO (Chief Blogging Officer), can I highlight that your
esteemed blog entry for January 25th is entirely different in English and German
:-)
Answer: I can only apologize…
24 January 2012
The only function of economic forecasting is to make astrology look respectable.
- John Kenneth Galbraith
23 January 2012
I got this poem by Joseph Beuys:
Let yourself go.
Learn to observe snakes.
Plant impossible gardens.
Invite someone dangerous to tea.
Make little signs that say "Yes"
And spread them throughout your house.
Become a friend of freedom and uncertainty.
Look forward to your dreams at night.
Cry at movies.
Swing as high as you can with a swing in the moonlight.
Nourish different moods.
Refuse to be "responsible".
Do it for love.
Take a lot of naps.
Give more money. Do it now. The money will follow.
Belief in witchcraft.
Laugh a lot.
Bathe in the moonlight.
Dream wild, fanciful dreams.
Draw on the walls.
Read every day.
Imagine you'd be enchanted.
Giggle with children. Listen to old people.
Open yourself. Dive in. Be free.
Praise yourself.
Don’t be afraid.
Play with everything.
Entertain your inner child.
You are innocent.
Build a castle made of blankets.
Get wet.
Hug trees.
Write love letters.
21 January 2012
In the series “remarkable quotes from telephone conferences”: A:
Can you go on mute, please? B: No. A: Well can you then at least refrain from
breathing?
20 January 2012
I promised to get back to you on the topic of skirt lengths and heel height.
Many years ago I read that there is a relationship between skirt lengths and
the economic cycle. They are indirectly proportional, so in recession times
we have long skirts although you'd assume there is less money for fabric while
skirts tend to be short in boom times. So my assumption is that in 2012 we're
going to move away from tight mini and pencil skirts!
After some more research I found out that the 1920 Hemline
Theory by George Taylor in fact suggests that hemlines on women's dresses
correlate with rising or falling stock prices. Anyway the theory has been extended
since. Quoting from “The
hemline index, updated” by Tamar Lewin "During a recession, laxatives
go up, because people are under tremendous stress, and holding themselves back," said
Shapiro, now chief executive of SAGE, a Chicago-based consulting firm. "During
a boom, deodorant sales go up, because people are out dancing around. When
people have less money, they buy more of the things that have less water in
them, things
that are not so perishable. Instead of lettuce and steak and fruit, it's rice
and beans and grain and pasta. Except this time the price of pasta's so high
that it's beans and rice."
Well to be honest I like the skirt length index better than the laxative one.
And well, I got the hint that this piece here was falling short on heel heights…
19 January 2012
I really want to take the opportunity of today’s entry and thank you
all for being raving fans of this blog!
Scott Mc Kain (yet another motivational
speaker with round glasses; oh no, I never said that...) says on his blog: “How
many followers do YOU have on Twitter?” “Have you maxed out your ‘friends’ on
Facebook?” “What’s the traffic on your blog?” Questions
anyone on social media are being asked these days — and it exemplifies
part of what has been wrong with our thinking in business: More must be better.
And, it’s NOT: More is just more. Better is better. In other words, having
fewer followers and friends — and providing something so compelling,
these people become raving fans — is superior to simply amassing numbers."
18 January 2012
As I am in exile and only going to Brussels on a day trip tomorrow I was told
that only very few people regard being away from Brussels as exile!
17 January 2012
I have to share a brilliant video on Photoshop
or rather: Fotoshop and another one on Viennese
Coffee Shops.
13 January 2012
Poet William Blake on how to start the day: "'Think in the morning, act
in the noon, read in the evening, and sleep at night.'
10 January 2012
I have seen e-mail signatures come and go and am not really sure whether they
are now en vogue or not. Recently they started to pop up again more and more.
One I liked was “Beauty comes first. Victory is secondary. What matters
is joy." - Sócrates (1954-2011)
9 January 2012
And yet again more pictures, this time from Thailand, Australia and New
Zealand!
Received comment: Nice photos especially Thai!
7 January 2012
It has been rather quiet with regard to the “promised land” Bavaria.
But well, there we go. A Bavarian radio station has come up with the rhyme
of the day: “It’s nice to be a Preiss (Prussian) but it’s
higher to be a Bayer (Bavarian).“
Another interesting development has been noticed at Munich’s airport. Mannequins
seem to sprout from the floors there. And I feel quite charmed that
they were associated with me. To tell you the truth I fear they are part of
Fujitsu’s recent advertisement campaign instead.
Fujitsu’s new
motto is „accept no boundaries“. It would appear that gravitation
is one of the boundaries that are no more. Not too well placed in Munich I
dare say. Speaking of which: A charming quote I read a few days ago, allegedly
by Einstein himself: „Gravitation is not responsible for people falling
in love“.
6 January 2012
There are quite some new pictures on this website now namely from Chile, Singapore, Myanmar, Kuala
Lumpur and Vietnam.
I swear I came across this article
on how to be interesting by pure coincidence. Nevertheless I really liked
the suggestions on embracing your inner weirdness.
There is more on that here.
Received comment: Inner weirdness? What poppycock. I embrace normality!
5 January 2012
Video of the day: Everybody’s
Free (to wear sunscreen).
4 January 2012
I found an old draft note for what I must have considered subjects of tomorrow
back then:
1. Are hovers better with or without bags?
2. Should men be able to cook eggs?
3. Are bolt ties better than regular ties? and
4. How to make pumpkins out of ice cream?
I must confess especially the latter is quite a mystery to me together with the
first item. It also escapes my mind why I have a soap bar next to a very sticky
piece of candy and an even sticker pen in my coat pocket.
3 January 2012
Due to a comment I received from a well wisher who is disappointed there is
not enough on fashion or sport on this blog I dare say I read elsewhere that
the colors of the season are smoothie colors. And then again that fits all
well with the overall tendency to blended or mashed food such as soups, smoothies,
cocktails etc. Mostly drinks I guess. Anyway my point is the spring colors
are very tolerant towards our eating habits.
Received comment: Thanks regarding the color advise for spring. Am sure your
readers will value items on skirt length and heel height and rugby in the future
:-)
2 January 2012
What I forgot in yesterday’s entry: The best advertisement punch line
I read was by Tudor watches with their rule number seven: “Seduction
is just a matter of time”. I could not agree more.
1 January 2012
So this was 2011: My one year sabbatical leave ended in late September and
the brief summary is: I would not have had any difficulties meandering through
the world for much, much longer.
I divide the longer version into various findings and/or lessons learnt:
On the status of the world at large: In a nutshell: Incompetence rules the
world.
On personal details: Often questions around “Where are you from?” end
up in a loop. „So where are you from?” “Austria.” “Sidney?” [note:
for reasons of simplicity:] “Vienna.” “Where are you going?” … “What's
your name?” … “What's your work?” … “How
much do you earn?” … “How old are you?” … “Are
you married?” … “What’s your shoe size?”… “Where
are you from?” “You already asked me that.” “Oh, I
forgot...”
On food and drinks: My overall advice is: don’t ever think a green bean
is a green bean. When in doubt remember it can and will most certainly be green
chili. One of the better encouragements for vegetarians I heard in Asia was:
I hope you like rice.
Top 3 (+1) cocktails: Ambience: Singapore Sling, Raffles Hotel, Singapore.
Quirky + best view: Coco Loco, Hotel Pink Flamingo, Acapulco. Best taste: Pina
Colaca, Boracay/The Phillipines. Extra ranking for most astute promise: Orgasmo,
Lake Chapala near Guadajahara, Mexico.
On hygiene and the right sequence: Always check first whether there is water
at all and only then put soap onto your hands. I’m still doing very badly
at that. And yes, a few years of regular Pilates training came in handy whenever
balance without touching any of the surroundings was required, for instance
most toilets.
On unfriendly controls at airports: Always take ample time when finishing your
water or when tying shoe laces again after an insulting approach to get rid
of any remaining water or off your shoes.
On vanity and/or losing it: Using a tiny black plastic sickness bag from a ferry
in lieu of an expensive handbag proves one has become less vein than one used
to.
On the material: Even waterproof shoes get wet if water (and leeches) are coming
from above the ankle. Jeans do not only get lighter, they also get much thinner
and eventually they are ripped apart. I lost a scarf, a sweater, my favorite
jacket and a bikini - fortunately not all at the same time or at a time when
those were the only things I was wearing respectively. Furthermore two people
of my acquaintance (obviously no friends of mine) and last but not least a
blanket - one of the more useful things I carried though how it slipped my
possession eludes my mind.
On hotels: Most hotel rooms are equipped with either a copy of the bible or
the yellow pages. Sometimes you’ll find both mostly when all you really
need is the password for the wireless Internet.
31 December 2011
„Due to the rain the revolution has been postponed“ is written
onto the window front of a shop in Munich. I think that summarizes the state
of the
world at the end of 2011 quite nicely. Broken Muses wishes all Broken Blog
readers a Happy New Year!
Received comment: I hope New Year’s wasn’t postponed due to the
rain, too…
30 December 2011
Having seen the tall crooked Christmas tree on Munich’s Marienplatz – a
gift from Tirol - once more my only advice to Munich is never to complain about
a free tree.
Received comment: Given your photographic instincts for the unusual and the broken,
it would have been delightful for you to have posted a photo (taken by you, of
course) of that crooked (dare we call it "broken"?) Christmas tree...
29 December 2011
My newspaper tells me that the latest trend in anaplastology (which is branch of medicine dealing with the prosthetic rehabilitation of an absent, disfigured, or malformed anatomically critical location of the face or body) is movable ears or eyes and eyelids. What seems to be en vogue as well is to have two sets of ears, one for the winter and one for the summer.
28 December 2011
I haven’t come across it consciously I fear but Wikipedia tells us that there is a phenomenon called the Hot Chocolate Effect. “It can be observed by pouring hot milk into a mug, stirring in chocolate powder, and tapping the bottom of the mug with a spoon while the milk is still in motion. The pitch of the taps will increase progressively with no relation to the speed or force of tapping. Subsequent stirring will gradually decrease the pitch again. The phenomenon is explained by the effect of bubble density on the speed of sound in the liquid. The note heard is the frequency of a standing wave where a quarter wavelength is the distance between the base of the mug and the liquid surface.” In the blog category: there you have it.
24 December 2011
Broken Muses wishes all Broken Blog readers Merry Christmas!
23 December 2011
Just discovered some recordings of this wonderful show called QI and so I thought
I might want to share my favourite bit, why
the giant tortoise had not got a name for 300 years. It is also quite remarkable that there is no Latin
name for Maltesers.
22 December 2011
I was reminded that I had not yet translated the German blog entry from December
11. I apologize for the lapse and am sorry for the inconvenience.
21 December 2011
A new bestseller has arrived to Germany's bookstores. "Text messages from
last night". Subtitle: “Did I leave my pants behind at your place?”
20 December 2011
My favourite Belgian chocolates used to be the pink hearts from Wittamer and
the dark brown Euros from Neuhaus. Now I am given to understand that Neuhaus
has decided to discontinue the Euro. What a statement if you think about
it! They still have the light brown and the dark brown Neuhaus Ns which are
similar in taste but well, that is beside the point I fear.
19 December 2011
One of the few Dutch phrases I can pronounce more or less without any accent
is “ik bin op de pot” which means I am on the toilet. Not a very
good resume after eight years in a partly dutchspeaking country.
17 December 2011
Having been made believe that Munich and/or Bavaria is heaven on earth and
/or the promised land I was thinking whether one needs to assume that Frankfurt
or more precisely Frankfurt airport is the navel of the world. In essence
I am sure there are people who believe that Frankfurt as such has been a
mere invention of the aviation industry who want us to believe that Frankfurt
is the true heart of Europe.
And when you then enter Belgium (over land) of course it is raining just
as you’d expect from Belgium. It is not all too surprising that one
of the fashion labels there is called “Mais il est ou, le soleil?”
16 December 2011
Many thanks for some nice quotes:
Can miles truly separate you from friends... If you want to be with someone
you like, aren't you already there? - Richard Bach
Absence diminishes mediocre passions and increases great ones, as the wind
extinguishes candles and fans fires. - Francois de La Rochefoucauld
14 December 2011
It seems that the most renowned Viennese app these days is the so-called "Toilet
Map Vienna". This app has been developed based on “Open Government
Data” and lists all public toilets. It helps to find the closest public
toilet in your surroundings.
12 December 2011
What I learnt is that in case of clogged pipes the quality of the soap that you
just used becomes irrelevant very quickly and equally appalling than any other
content that surfaces.
11 December 2011
I really don’t know whether subscribing to Groupon has been my greatest
idea in 2011. I doubt it. Amongst the things I’ve been offered lately
were coupons for a fondue dinner in the style of the 1970-ies at a reduced
rate of minus 55%. I could also have bought a coupon for 5 dance classes at
the Bollywood Crazy Dance Company (reduction 53%). I should also mention a
facial and/or manicure at Egoist Cosmetics (72% off). Egoist Cosmetics promise
that “nobody is facing the passing of time, wind and weather as much
as your skin”. So it would appear that my skin (or anyone’s really)
experiences wind and weather much differently differently than the rest of
me. Interesting, isn’t it?
10 December 2011
Can I ask my readers for help in boycotting wasabi cheese? Cheese manufacturers
may face tough international competition these days but to be honest wasabi
cheese take things one step too far.
9 December 2011
I hear that there are people who really enjoy a rip to Ikea. I am definitely
not one of them. Besides more and more I feel like starring in Hinterholz
8, an Austrian movie about renovating a ruined house that eventually
gets more and more destroyed. At a certain moment the hero thinks the only
remedy
against wet walls under electricity is waterproof wallpaper…
Received comment: Margit it appears you’d rather leave sooner
than later
for the lack of intelligent life down here in Munich.
Answer: Was I that outspoken?
8 December 2011
For those interested in religion: www.vorleser.net offers the bible as audiobook-app
for iPhone, iPad and iPod.
7 December 2011
Many thanks to somebody who really made me laugh today when pointing me to
Bulgarian modern artist Yanko Tsvetkov’s mapped
stereotypes.
I especially liked Europe
according to the Greeks. For our British readers
I also recommend a brief look onto Europe
according to Britain.
6 December 2011
News from Repubblica Bavaria: Earlier today the Bavarian minister president
opened a summit with the words "welcome to the promised land".
And I swear there was not a trace of irony.
4 December 2011
Sorting through some of my pictures I came across a book ad I had noted: “Bury
my heart at conference room B – The unbeatable impact of truly committed
managers”.
2 December 2011
News from Absurdistan (vulgo Belgium): Am invited to a discussion called: “The
Unbearable lightness of the butterfly. What new taxes will the new Belgian
government bring us?”
END OF THE DECEMBER EDITION - FOR EARLIER ENTRIES PLEASE CLICK HERE
